We love our kids; what parent doesn't? Part of the manifestation of our love is in deliberately training them, day in and day out, from the very beginning. Our training sometimes involves corporal punishment (beginning at around 1.5 years of age). My authority is the Bible, which says: Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it ~ Proverbs 22: 6 ; and He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes ~ Proverbs 13: 24.
Show me a child who was never spanked, and I'll show you an unhappy, self-absorbed, disliked individual.
Anyhoo, here's an email that was forwarded to me, showing another parent's method of training his child: Show me a child who was never spanked, and I'll show you an unhappy, self-absorbed, disliked individual.
Most people think it is improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control my kids when they have one of those 'moments'. One that I found effective is for me to just take the child for a car ride and talk.
Some say it's the vibration from the car, others say it's the time away from any distractions such as TV, Video Games, Computer, IPod, etc.
Either way, my kids usually calm down and stop misbehaving after our car ride together. Eye to eye contact helps a lot too.
I've included a photo below of one of my sessions with my son, in case you would like to use the technique.
Sincerely,
Your Friend
People used to think it was necessary to "spank" adult members of the community, military trainees, and prisoners. In some countries they still do. In our country, it is considered sexual battery if a person over the age of 18 is "spanked", but only if over the age of 18.
ReplyDeleteFor one thing, because the buttocks are so close to the genitals and so multiply linked to sexual nerve centers, slapping them can trigger powerful and involuntary sexual stimulation in some people. There are numerous physiological ways in which it can be sexually abusive, but I won't list them all here. One can use the resources I've posted if they want to learn more.
Child buttock-battering vs. DISCIPLINE:
Child buttock-battering (euphemistically labeled "spanking","swatting","switching","smacking", "paddling",or other cute-sounding names) for the purpose of gaining compliance is nothing more than an inherited bad habit.
Its a good idea for people to take a look at what they are doing, and learn how to DISCIPLINE instead of hit.
I think the reason why television shows like "Supernanny" and "Dr. Phil" are so popular is because that is precisely what many (not all) people are trying to do.
There are several reasons why child bottom-slapping isn't a good idea. Here are some good, quick reads recommended by professionals:
Plain Talk About Spanking
by Jordan Riak,
The Sexual Dangers of Spanking Children
by Tom Johnson,
NO VITAL ORGANS THERE, So They Say
by Lesli Taylor M.D. and Adah Maurer Ph.D.
Most compelling of all reasons to abandon this worst of all bad habits is the fact that buttock-battering can be unintentional sexual abuse for some children. There is an abundance of educational resources, testimony, documentation, etc available on the subject that can easily be found by doing a little research with the recommended reads-visit the website of Parents and Teachers Against Violence In Education at www.nospank.net.
Just a handful of those helping to raise awareness of why child bottom-slapping isn't a good idea:
American Academy of Pediatrics,
American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry,
American Psychological Association,
Center For Effective Discipline,
Churches' Network For Non-Violence,
Nobel Peace Prize recipient Archbishop Desmond Tutu,
Parenting In Jesus' Footsteps,
Global Initiative To End All Corporal Punishment of Children,
United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child.
In 26 countries, child corporal punishment is prohibited by law (with more in process). In fact, the US was the only UN member that did not ratify the Convention on the Rights of the Child.
(1)I do not watch Supernanny nor Dr Phil. Please read the Biblical references in my original post. Here's one more : "For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. Furthermore we have fathers of our flesh which correctd us, and we gave them reverence...Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward IT YIELDETH THE PEACEABLE FRUIT OF RIGHTEOUSNESS unto them which are exercised thereby" (Hebrews 12).
ReplyDelete(2) Because of our training and disciplining, which included spanking but NOT abuse (physical or sexual) or battering, our children are a happy bunch, and a pleasure to be with. Friends and strangers have praised their great character, work ethic, attitude, intelligence, you name it. They won't be gracing some therapist's couch anytime soon. Such a contrast to the majority of kids and young adults nowadays, the majority of whom were likely not disciplined/spanked.